The Beatles, "Yesterday"

Growing up, I really wasn't that big a fan of The Beatles. Never saw the appeal. Something changed in my head though--fairly recently in fact--and now a have a new appreciation of their genius. There is just something about their lyrics that just strike me the right way now.

Anyway, this song, from the 1965 album Help!, hits me in a way that is quite different from the intended meaning. "Yesterday" is about a break-up. For me, it's kind of about my struggle with cancer.

Just over four years ago, I went to see my doctor to discuss some terrible headaches I had been having. He sent me for an MRI and, a few days later, I had the answer. Brain cancer, just six months after the birth of my little girl. I put on a brave face about it, but inside, I was devastated.

That sudden feeling of devastation is what this song is all about. "Yesterday/All my troubles seemed so far away/Now it looks as though they're here to stay/Oh, I believe in yesterday." My life was so much easier pre-cancer. I long for those days now. Needless to say, my life has been drastically different since then. "Suddenly/I'm not half the man I used to be/There's a shadow hanging over me/Oh, yesterday came suddenly." Oh, how I wish to emerge from that shadow. For the past four years I've been deep within that shadow, but even though there is still darkness around me, things are finally starting to get a little brighter.